New Adveture

After an exceptionally long hiatus, I think I have a new vision for this blog and will attempt the enter the blogger-sphere yet again!  More coming soon ...

Learning to Live Without a Plan

Something I processed through Saturday.  It's too close to my heart not to share ....

I spent today co-leading a retreat for a group of college students that will be spending the month of May in Africa.  It was amazing!  Hearing their stories, asking questions, answering questions, and basically pouring in as much as they were willing.  It gave me the time to reflect on my own month long ission experience when i was in college.

AND forced me to become comfortable with my current story.  Not that I am uncomfortable (because I don't think comfort is what I am striving for), but I am asking lots of questions.  I have been without a job for amost 1 week.  I made the tough decision to return to the northwest without a "plan" set in place.  In come ways it was the toughest and easiest decision I have ever made.  I had huge peace about it, endless support, and everything fell into place.

5 days after I graduated from college, I was offered my job in SF.  My internship and later full-time position in the south fell in quickly after.  In reality, I've never had more than 5 days without a plan and even over those 5 days, I was planning on attending Urbana before I figured anything else out.  Notice a common theme?  PLAN.

Which leads me to today.  In the last 3 years, 1 month, and 7 days, I've graduated college, moved to SF and poured my life into innercity work, moved ot the south and worked as a youth pastor, extablished a life 2700 miles from my known friends and family, drown to love my gathered family in Louisiana, poured into junior high and high school students, and moved back to the northwest ... It's exhausting to just reread that.  But if anyone asks, I would do it all again in a heartbeat.  It has made me into who i am and I will forever be grateful.

All of this leaves me with 5 words I am meditating on.  I believe God has given me this and I'm holding onto the knowledge that He has an awesome plan.

• GUIDANCE
• DREAMS
• CALLING
• PRIORITIIES
• FURTURE

5 words that are becoming my anthem of the unknown.  Praying, listening, learning, growing, and waiting.  Learning to be a daughter, sister and friend who is here.  Growing into who God wants me to be.  Refocusing on the calling God has for my life.  Listening for the voice fo God and to wise counsel.  Praying with fervor and meekness.  And waiting for what is next as I journey to God's plan for my life as it continueally unfolds in ways I never imagined.

And this is only 6 days into this new chapter. :)

What is your ultimate goal?

One of my conversations this morning left me asking this question: "what is your ultimate goal?"  Now this morning someone said to something to the effect of "well, if it makes you happy .."  Now without divulging into the WHOLE conversation, this got me thinking.  Should that really be our answer to things?  Is my ultimate goal happiness?  Well .. no.  Now don't get me wrong.  My goal is not to be unhappy but I think it's shallow to think that happiness is how we should make our decisions. 

More on that later, but now I'm off to put blocks together for an activity tonight.  It may take a while ....

- N

Pensive Processing

I am one of those people who is often told that I'm not what people expect.  I don't fit well into any box that people try to find for me.  And to be honest, that brings me great joy, but that is entirely different post.  :)

I had Sunday off.  That's right.  I said it.  Off.  As in, not working in any capacity, including not spending any time with students.  With the exception of a few stray texts that arrived at my phone, it was a no-work day.  I went to church .... like a normal person.  I arrived a 5 minutes before it started and left without talking to people expect for the few I passed as I returned to my car.  I drove home and committed to not leaving.  Spending the whole day at my place.  Not to say that after a few hours I didn't think about leaving, but I didn't and that brought me here.  Pensively processing life. 

Social networking sites are always good for a substantial distraction, so I logged into Facebook and saw a link on my Newsfeed that peaked my interest.  Someone had posted on one of my Facebook friend's wall about a Myers Briggs test he took and encouraging this friend to take it also.

I took one in high school but have not since.  I've talked to many people who say that it changes over the years as you change.  I tend to think that maybe we are just better figuring out who we are and are more accurately able to articulate it.  Anyways, approximately 100 questions later I was given my 4 letters.  Now when I took it as a sophomore in high school, I was deemed "ENTJ" (extroverted, intuitive, thinking, judging).  My memories of it are minimal, but I do remember agreeing with aspects of what the profile said and strongly disagreeing with others.  As one who doesn't like the idea of "the essence of me" being placed in a box, it didn't bother me at all.

But here I am.  MANY years later and the results were different.  "INFJ" (introverted, intuitive, feeling, judging).  And as I read through the discription given of the "Counselor" as it is deemed, it was me.  Completely.  Strange personality nuances and quirks that others find off the wall were explained and praised!  Crazy!  Now, one of the many things I appreciated about this particular site was that all of the personality types were looked at in a positive light.  Forcing me to walk away confident and proud of who I was.  (If you have a few minutes, I would encourage you to click on the INFJ link above and read through.  That is me (more or less :)) in 4 paragraphs!)

All of that to say that it has and is challenging me to ponder life, both good and bad, both individually and communally.  Strengths and weakness.  And I have loved it.  Hope you enjoy.

Much joy and blessings as we are all challenged to live out who it is God has called us to be, and as we strive to live, serve, and be the way were were created to.

Love

Thanksgiving Thankfulness Trip Part 1

And .... I'm in Nashville!  I got here last night and went to "Thanksgiving Dinner" with Court and a ton of her friends at "the guys house".  Definitely flashbacks to college.  Court & I were the only ones who had graduated.  Everyone was super nice and it was fun to be a part of that community for a while.   Then we went to Rumours which is a charming winebar with some different friends and had a fun girls night.  At one point everyone took our their phones and tweeted about our conversation, involving @hypotheticaldog ... I was the only one who has negated the Twitter world.  As of right now ... I still am holding out but the pressure has been intense.  More to come on that later I'm sure.

Church this morning with awesome!  Stellar worship and a kick a** message.  Totally refreshed and looking forward to bringing some of it back to the Highway kids.  If any of you are spending a Sunday in the Nashville area, worship at Long Hollow in Hendersonville.  Quite possibly could be life changing.

Now we're off to catch a movie and then just chill tonight.  Many more adventures to come!

Beauty

I remember driving somewhere through west Texas on our way to Colorado this summer and seeing a billboard that read "See that sunset? I painted it for you. - God"

This is what I saw on my birthday. Not great pics from the phone but beautiful none the less. Praise!!

The perfect ending to a wonderful birthday!!

Seatbelts. Anyone? Anyone?

I sounded like Mom today and I was so mad, I didn't even think twice.

Here's the deal. C, J, A & I went to lunch together today. Typical Thursday. I drove and when we left lunch, J says to A, "Dude, put your seat belt on."

I glanced in my rearview mirror and look at A as if to say "And..." And he just sits there!! So I stopped the car before we pulled out, put it in park, took my foot off the brake, and crossed my arms. That's right. I'm stubborn and there's nothing you can do about it. He finally put his seatbelt on and I drove us back to work as we continued with a lively discussion of who has the "right" to make someone wear their seatbelt.

Totally something Mom would do, but Geez em!!! I dug in my heels and only our group of peeps would continue with an "animated" conversation about legislating the wearing of seat belts.

So funny!!