Learning to Live Without a Plan

Something I processed through Saturday.  It's too close to my heart not to share ....

I spent today co-leading a retreat for a group of college students that will be spending the month of May in Africa.  It was amazing!  Hearing their stories, asking questions, answering questions, and basically pouring in as much as they were willing.  It gave me the time to reflect on my own month long ission experience when i was in college.

AND forced me to become comfortable with my current story.  Not that I am uncomfortable (because I don't think comfort is what I am striving for), but I am asking lots of questions.  I have been without a job for amost 1 week.  I made the tough decision to return to the northwest without a "plan" set in place.  In come ways it was the toughest and easiest decision I have ever made.  I had huge peace about it, endless support, and everything fell into place.

5 days after I graduated from college, I was offered my job in SF.  My internship and later full-time position in the south fell in quickly after.  In reality, I've never had more than 5 days without a plan and even over those 5 days, I was planning on attending Urbana before I figured anything else out.  Notice a common theme?  PLAN.

Which leads me to today.  In the last 3 years, 1 month, and 7 days, I've graduated college, moved to SF and poured my life into innercity work, moved ot the south and worked as a youth pastor, extablished a life 2700 miles from my known friends and family, drown to love my gathered family in Louisiana, poured into junior high and high school students, and moved back to the northwest ... It's exhausting to just reread that.  But if anyone asks, I would do it all again in a heartbeat.  It has made me into who i am and I will forever be grateful.

All of this leaves me with 5 words I am meditating on.  I believe God has given me this and I'm holding onto the knowledge that He has an awesome plan.

• GUIDANCE
• DREAMS
• CALLING
• PRIORITIIES
• FURTURE

5 words that are becoming my anthem of the unknown.  Praying, listening, learning, growing, and waiting.  Learning to be a daughter, sister and friend who is here.  Growing into who God wants me to be.  Refocusing on the calling God has for my life.  Listening for the voice fo God and to wise counsel.  Praying with fervor and meekness.  And waiting for what is next as I journey to God's plan for my life as it continueally unfolds in ways I never imagined.

And this is only 6 days into this new chapter. :)